There’s a lot of talk about authenticity these days. Good stuff, mostly, but I think people are a little confused by what it means to be really real. I’ve heard and read more than a few times that being really real is carte blanche to “let it all out.”
So when a client asked me recently, “What if my authentic self is angry?” I had to put pen to paper (fingers to the keyboard).
Love and fear
A Course in Miracles states there is only love. Emotions like anger, hate, worry, and jealousy, are all forms of fear.
I think of fear as an anti-love thought. So when you’re in the grip of emotions like anger, it’s important to realize that you are in the antithesis of your true nature. You are being inauthentic.
We can debate until the cows come home if anger is good, productive or even necessary, however, it is a normal and common human emotion, and a very good indicator of our emotional state. Anger, and any of the other fear-based emotions, are important gauges of emotional status and we can use them for self-inquiry and ultimately to get to a more peaceful, happy state (which, BTW, is your natural, authentic nature).
Problems can occur when we let anti-thoughts drive the bus of our life. When we make a decision out of anger (or worry or jealousy, etc.) we’re not working from our highest nature.
When you’ve made a decision under the influence of anger, or worry or desperation you can say, “I wasn’t in my right mind when I made that one.”
Your right mind is love and loving.
If you’re honest with yourself and do a little survey of decisions you’ve made under the influence of anti-thoughts, these most likely haven’t had the best outcomes.
As you develop more self-awareness, you can use your awareness of your emotions to help you move back into your authentic-ness. Back to love.
Emotions are a natural part of being human. Instead of allowing emotions to drive you, however, you can use them as an indicator system, helping you return to your authenticity.
Whenever you feel a negative emotion rising within you, this is your indicator that your peace is disturbed. You are moving away from your authentic nature. In that moment, you can make a choice for peace.
I love this litmus test for deciding what to do.
WWLD: the truth of your authenticity
Your authentic self is loving, peaceful, joyful. In the laboratory of your mind you may think it’s easy to stay really real. In reality, it’s sometimes hard. Be kind, be gentle with yourself as you journey back to your authentic self.
Staying really real isn’t easy and I find it helpful to have tools to help me stay authentic. One of them is WWLD – an acronym for “What Would Love Do.” When I notice that my peace is disturbed, I ask myself, “WWLD?” and try to align my thoughts and behaviors accordingly. Sometimes I succeed in staying in my really real. When I don’t, I apply WWLD to myself and try to make a better choice next time.
My friend, love, peace and joy are your true nature, your really real. Let that be the driver of your life. OX